Dear customers with poor register etiquette,
I have compiled a short how to manual on accepted check out behavior. It is evident many of you have never worked in retail. The average person does not need a lesson in putting items on a counter and then paying for those items. Probably because it’s not a difficult task. But there are those of you who require a lesson in basic customer service interactions. This is for you.
1. There is no register at the side counter of the front register. I am standing there because it affords me a view of the information desk and the registers. That way I can converse with my co-workers and keep an eye on any customers in need of assistance. Do not walk up to the counter (that clearly has no register or register-like equipment on it) and put your books down. There isn’t even a computer monitor there to mistake for a cash register. It’s an empty counter; at most it has a stack of books and my latte with an extra shot of espresso to help me deal with people like you.
2. When you come up to the counter do not put your stack of 20 books on the grey pad next to the scanner. It gives me no room to scan the books. The pad is our demagnetizer, it’s not some magical scale that weighs your books and give me a price. Put your books on the counter so as I scan, I can place them in a pile on the grey pad instead of reaching around and putting them by another register or in front of you. Conversely, if you are only purchasing two or three books don’t hand them to me. Put them on the counter and I can pick them up myself. Do not hand them to me one at a time, either.
3. So your books are being rung up and you want to pay. That is all well and good, but don’t hold out your credit card the second you set the books on the counter. I will not take it from you. You can hold it out until all the blood drains from your hand. I still won’t take it. I am busy and don’t want your card yet. Remember how the grey pad doesn’t give me an automatic total price? Give me a minute, I’m not scanning and typing for my health. I will take the card after I tell you the total. And don’t hold out your hand all grabby to get the card back as I’m swiping it. You were so interested in giving it to me, let me hold it for a few seconds.
4. The other option in paying for you people is counting out your money onto the counter and leaving it an inch in front of you. Then I have to reach across the counter; usually over your books or bag, sometimes around your giant purse. Put it in my hand. At the very least slide it halfway across the counter, especially if there are coins involved. I will hold out my hand for you to put the money in. Don’t look off into the distance and ignore me.
5. The next step in the check out procedure is a question which seems to baffle you. “Would you like a bag?” It’s not difficult. Do you want to carry your books in a bag or in your hand? Don’t purse your lips, wrinkle your nose, and hem and haw about the decision. Do not say, “Of course” in a snooty voice after I ask this question if you only have one or two books. Lots of people don’t want/need bags for only a few items. Don’t make me want to cut you.
6. The receipt. I will give it to you. I promise. Do not ask me for it if it hasn’t even come out of the register. Do not take the signed credit card receipt because you are in a hurry. DO NOT rip the receipt from the register. I hate that most of all. Slow down, you’re at a terrible angle to be pulling on the thin piece of paper with your sales info on it. You’ll get it soon enough. Maybe I’ll put it in that bag you took 5 minutes to decide to get.
Lesson over. I hope you took notes. If you can put even one of these into action I will hate you one sixth less that I hate you now.
Sincerely,
Kelly
