Dear free gift wrap girl,
You called the store today and asked if we had complimentary gift wrap during the holidays. I informed you that we offer free gift wrap all year round and there would be a table devoted to wrapping closer to Christmas. You asked if you could bring something into the store to be wrapped. I asked you to clarify.
“Can I bring stuff in for you guys to wrap? Like can I bring in presents?”
Uh, no. I told you we only wrap items we’ve sold. You were not pleased.
“Well that’s dumb.”
I apologized for the inconvenience and told you we sold gift wrap in the store.
“Well can I come to the store and buy something there and then have you wrap something else?”
No. You would still be asking us to wrap an item from another store. That is a stupid question. At this time in the conversation I had a customer in the store waiting to ask me a question. I wanted to stop talking to you.
“So, I can’t like, buy something there and have you wrap something else? I’m still buying something in your store. Can’t you just wrap a different gift?”
I repeated that we can “unfortunately” only wrap items we sell in the store. Then I glanced at the customer in front of me to let her know I would be with her shortly. She laughed at what I had told you. I gave a slight eye roll while you yammered on and on.
“Well could you wrap both of the things? Like what I bought there and another gift if they’re for the same person?”
I repeated the very easy to understand fact that we ONLY wrap items we’ve sold from OUR store. The customer laughed and gave me an eye roll of her own. She thought you were an idiot too.
You were pissed.
“Well then I guess I won’t be buying anything from your store then,” you said and hung up.
Oh no, you won’t be buying the cheapest item in the store and then unloading a car full of presents for us to wrap for free? Fuck! I really screwed the store out of business today, didn’t I? Don’t be so goddamn lazy. That conversation should not have taken so long. Truly, that conversation should never have happened in the first place. I am not a fan of the “It never hurts to ask” policy. It hurts me down to my very soul when I have to explain a simple concept to a cheap ass customer while a paying customer waits for assistance.
Wrap your presents in newspaper and call yourself a hipster, just be sure to leave me alone.
Sincerely,
Kelly
